Part One
The Heroes Meet

Turf, a young and up and coming Hero, entered the Hall of Heroes for Hire in the Simplagul capitol city of Easy Breezy hoping to find a wizard that would give him a Virgin (since he'd had no luck finding Virgins down on the Cabbage Farm where he grew up dreaming he was a Hero and not a loser). Butt-kissing (both literally and metaphorically) Buster, an up and coming Singing Guy Who Writes Stories Guy (who had yet to sing or write any stories about anything except maybe that time he saw his sister naked), also entered the Hall of Heroes for Hire. But he wasn't looking for a wizard or a virgin unless they had what he was really looking for which was life experiences to make his stories have more meaning than a guilty boner. Sneaky Guy Dade Thraid, an up and coming dead guy, was also here at the Hall of Heroes for Hire to find something to steal and some guys to help watch his back while he steals from them. LEGObrick, an up and coming disappearing Magick Guy, also was here instead of playing Starcraft like he really wanted to be.

"Hey, I'm Buster," blurted out Buster. "Wanna hear a song?"

"What brings you to the Hall of Heroes for Hire," ignored Dade Thraid (which Buster would get used to very quickly).

"Greetings m'lords and ladies," greeted LEGObrick, mistaking Buster for a lady and the rest of them for lords.

Turf, being a Hero, decided to not let Buster hang on his song question and replied heroically, "No."

"I'm looking for dragons and virgins," expatriated Turf, secretly hoping he never found a dragon since it would kill him and secretly hoping he never found a virgin because he wouldn't know what to do with one.

"Oh," cried Buster, disappointed that no one wanted to hear a song but really glad because the only song he'd ever written to this point was about his younger sister's naked boobies and how he did that thing he was really guilty about that involved his right hand, mostly.

"I'm here to learn the art of magick!" shouted LEGObrick, the Magick Guy.

"Hey, I got a song to sing if you want to hear," drunkenly drunked Buster after quickly drinking twenty ales so that he wouldn't feel bad about his sister's boobies song.

"No," repeated Turf, realizing, as a Hero should, that this Singing Guy was holding a Ukulele and nobody wanted to hear a song played on a Ukulele.

"I am here for fame and glory but mainly for Goldoons," whispered the Sneaky Guy Dade Thraid. Too bad he was in the Hall of Heroes for Hire in Simplagul since Simplagul was mainly known for everybody in it not having any Goldoons at all.


II. Who is Lola?

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